First, photograph all of the Operation Rescue protesters, their cars and license plates. Be really obvious what you are doing.

Second, call the property owners where their cars are parked and let the property owners know that they have twenty anti-abortion protesters trespassing on their property and assembling disgusting 6'x8' signs depicting dismembered fetuses on their property. This property owner calls in the tow trucks.

Third, call the police, so they can save your ass if things get too rough.

Fourth, wade into the crowd and start yelling "Jesus is love! Stop the Hate!" Don't stop until somebody hits you.

Fifth, hope the cops are there to stop the developing melee.

Sixth, yell "Help, they are assaulting me," when they lose it and start attacking you.

Watch with an incredible sense of satisfaction as the cops shut down the demonstration after only forty-five minutes and send everybody home whose car hasn't been towed.

Walk back to your car, buy a six pack, and enjoy a beautiful afternoon sitting on your deck watching the eagles hunt prairie dogs and rabbits behind your house.

That, ladies and gentlemen, is a thing well worth celebrating.

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